As you know, I have four dogs. Jada, the mom, and her sons, Roswell, Bernie, and Bill.

However, most of my neighbors seem to think I only have three.

With me walking Jada so much, they see her.

Bill and Bernie go on so many unauthorized walks, that most people around us know them by sight. A couple even knows their favourite treats.

That leaves our last dog, Roswell.

Now, I am not sure if you know about how he got his name. A little background: I lived in an apartment growing up. Pets were a hassle, except for birds or fish and the deposit to get a dog was more than we could afford.

But that did not keep me from wanting one.

As a teen, I wanted a Golden Retriever. To me, they seemed like the perfect dogs to have as a friend. I did not make friends easily in those days (not much has changed) and the idea of a dog friend was appealing.

I pictured a best bud to go on walks and just tolerate me.

Somewhere at the time was a book or a movie that had a dog in it named Roswell. I fell in love with the name, and that was my goal.

A Goldie I would call Roswell.

Fast-forward to 2016 and four dogs later, our dog (a shepherd-beagle mix) was expecting puppies. The wife told me in no uncertain terms, this was the last dogs we would ever own.

My last chance for a dog named Roswell. 

Now, many people hear the name Roswell and assume, alien, flighty, paranoid, or a big fan of conspiracy theories. 

I think they are referring to me, but it describes Roswell to a tee.

He doesn’t get out of the house or yard. Not because he is not well behaved. But unlike Bernie and Bill, he is the only dog I know that is terrified of the outside. He goes out to go to the bathroom, then runs back in.

He likes to run around in circles and bark at nothing. And for no reason. Twice while writing this, he did and once he ran into the wall.

When he does that, I picture him wearing a tin foil hat.

Jada, Bill, and Bernie will look away if you look them in the eyes. Roswell will stare right back as if he wants to read your mind.

We keep the front part of the house gated from the back. Jada is 13 and at times not into playing like the three-year-old boys, so she stays in the back. Roswell has a mission in life to open the gate and rescue his mom.

Which is another strange thing, Bill bonded to me, and Bernie to my wife.

Roswell has bonded to his mom. He lets us pet him, but he runs to her before he runs to us. Of course, she is not a fan of him, so she growls at him at times. If it involves a food caper, he is her best friend.

My neighbors just recently got introduced to him. I took him on a walk with Jada. The neighbors asked if I got a new dog.

I said he just doesn’t like to go out much. They oohed and aahed. Complimented him on how well behaved he was, and how quiet he was.

Which reinforced my belief.

The quiet ones are insane.

Michael Cole
Author: Michael Cole